Consumption from the fire is inevitable.
In fact, the fire tends to even consume itself
to be later reignited via spontaneous combustion.

It is really not the fire that consumes us
it is our own willingness to give love and 
the ego of our partners willingness to receive our love
it only feels like consumption
when there is no give and take both ways

I took a nap
and when I awoke
a beautiful warm memory of my mother
just popped into my head
I smiled as I remembered her smile
the life she sacrificed
to give me life
then I recall the words in a book that I am reading
about reality
how memories of the past are only illusions
this disturbs me
my mother has passed
momentos and memories are all I have left
If they are not real......
I guess
I have to choose illusion
at least sometimes
when I miss her smile

Gazing through a frosty window
at winters first snowfall
surrounded by warmth
but aware of the chill in the night air
the serenity of the sight
breathtaking
Large individual flakes gently fall
rocking the land to sleep
while coalescing into oneness
And your soul
settles into stillness and calm

There is an awareness
of our human wants and desires
we know
they are not what we want at all
We are life
not things
not possessions
We are love
not hate, jealousy,
ambition or our work
We are the Awareness
We are each other

Surely Alice did not
chase the rabbit down a hole
You cannot find the light
within the dark
For the rabbit
hides only in the moon

She is Still Silent
In memory of "Maggie"


Completely engulfed with activity
Multiple Phones ringing
Radios squelching
Then...your mind latches on
A voice, strained, laced with urgency
Yet you are trudging on with all you have to do.
But...listening...intently
Suddenly, stances change
Faces contort with multiple expressions
Dreadful yet exciting anticipation abounds
The doors gently roll open, as if in slow motion
You see them....giving their all
Anxious, hesitant to stop and step away..
Then you see her
She is our, my, responsibility now
Everything else disappears into the background
Nothing, but what you need to hear is heard
Seeking her eyes, for there is where life lives
She is silent
Eyes cold
Looking at you, but not seeing
Her youth, Her beauty screams out desperately
The stench of vomit wafts through the air mockingly
More voices, also strained, commanding, reporting
Bodies and hands continuously in motion
Each with a different purpose
working harmoniously, diligently toward the same goal
Her skin is still soft, viable, warm.......
Yet, She remains silent
Lord, help us!
She is still silent!
Continuously searching for signs
Hanging on to hope
Then Locking with her cold stare
the thread of hope fades away
Bones and flesh give way, almost as if it were normal
Under our forceful, futile attempts
Emotions prolong us, urging us to continue
She is still Silent
Abruptly, the rest of the world crashes in, engulfing...
Another voice, unfamiliar, filled with love, dread and anguish
Escalates in sorrow, rage and disbelief
Carving intense memories into our souls, my soul
Begging and pleading from the depths of our hearts
The futility is realized.
She is still silent.

Tammy Cerniglia  May 10, 2005

Kiss me
where the moon touches the sea
Touch me
with the fire of the sun
Caress me
like the wind against a flower
Hold me
like a tree bearing fruit
Drink me
like a bee feeding on nectar
Breathe me
as spirit moves inside
Love me
as though tomorrow does not exist

For many answers that is.  I suppose I will be waiting awhile.  A lifetime even. 

I am finally back to work, only part time tho'.  Feeling pretty good but still tired.  Working everyday on the spiritual aspect of life.  Trying to find meaning in what is going on in my life right now.  Just taking it day by day.  Waiting for some answers.  And more waiting......

Shame on me.  I have actually been keeping a journal for controlling my weight but recently I have ignored my spiritual side.  Why do I do that?  I know that everything is a balance, that we must stay connected to ourselves at all levels or we lose it.  Balance creates health and then when you are unbalanced, why do you only seek to nuture the aspect that is lacking.  Or the aspect that you perceive as being the most important, which is usually the least.  Do our minds purposely play tricks on us?